"Clearly, the desert has done to me what it has done to many of us desert freaks- it has made me ask questions about myself that I would never otherwise have asked. And since I have convincing answers to those questions, I have not done what one has been supposed to do in deserts ever since the time of Moses I have not "found myself." If anything I have lost myself, in the sense that I now feel that I understand myself less than I did before."